The Great Frilly Curtain Catastrophe


Contrary to popular belief, bulls are not enraged by the color red, as used in capes by professional matadors, and as depicted in countless cartoons. In fact, cattle are red-green color-blind. It is not the color of the cape that angers the bull, but rather the movement of the fabric that irritates it and incites it to charge.

This was the cause of "The Great Frilly Curtain Catastrophe" of 1954, where a curtain-makers' outdoor convention was set up in rural Arkansas, right next to the state's biggest Stud bull farm. A center-stage demonstration of opening and closing the X-K117 model, also known as the "Chantilly Lace Superfringe 2000" caught the eye of several bulls roaming the nearby meadow and caused them to storm into the crowd, trampling several little old ladies and closeted gay men, as well as countless yards of high quality fabric. This incident led to the passing of the "Closed Curtains" act of 1955 which stipulated that all curtain, fabric, linen, or other textile conventions must be held indoors.

No comments:

Post a Comment